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Jeddah's avatar

The opposite of life is not death.... It is not living. That's what I heard Iain Mcgilchrist say once. The human aliveness lab seems good to me 😊

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Krista Stryker's avatar

Yes! I absolutely agree...

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Sandra Ann Miller's avatar

Krista, I'm going to have to respectfully disagree; happiness isn't necessarily fleeting, and the aliveness you're talking about is a form of happiness. Hedonic happiness, the happiness that comes from outside of us (people, places, material things) is shorter-lived. That's the brand that gives the rollercoaster/fleeting effect. True happiness, the eudaimonic stuff, is cultivated within. Having a sense of purpose, worth and appreciation; its source is endless as long as we nurture it by being present. That sounds like aliveness, yes? But if the word 'happiness' turns you off, I get it. You're talking to the chick who can't stand 'gratitude'. LOL. And I love the concept of your lab. Congratulations. If you can't tell, I'm on fire about splitting the hairs of what actual, true happiness is. It's not bliss. It's not toxic positivity. It's not ignoring what's happening and pretending everything is fine, just fine. Nope. It's feeling all of our emotions; it's being curious about what we do and why. It's being open to our potential. Much like what you described as aliveness. Building that inner garden creates confidence and resilience. And we need that (as well as passion... in tandem with passion) now more than ever. Love this, Krista. xo

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Krista Stryker's avatar

I love the pushback Sandra, and I love your definition of happiness - I agree, at its core, it's very much like how I'm defining aliveness! I've been turned off by the self-help industry and the word happiness for so long that perhaps I'm thinking about it wrong. And I love your passion, obviously :)

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Sandra Ann Miller's avatar

Believe me, I get it, Krista. There are so many terms co-opted by the toxic positivity tribe, I just can’t. But I feel the need to defend happiness because what we think it to be is so twisted and misunderstood. I mean, the “pursuit of happiness”?!!? That’s not how it’s done, FFS. LOL. It comes from us, not to us. Love your passion, too. xo

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Krista Stryker's avatar

So in your definition of happiness... does it include other feelings? Sadness, fear, disappointment, etc.? So curious!

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Sandra Ann Miller's avatar

Yes! Not only does it include other feelings, feeling ALL your emotions is required. Feeling something else doesn’t mean you’re unhappy. Happiness (eudaimonic) is meant to be the foundation. (Also, that’s not just my opinion; there’s science on it.) BTW, sometimes, flipping off a crap driver can make me ridiculously happy. LOL. xo

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Krista Stryker's avatar

Fascinating :)

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Avraham Cohen, PhD, RCC, CCC's avatar

Hi Krista

I agree with you that feeling alive is the ‘antidote’ to despair and all experiences that are tough. I don’t see it as a preventative. Perhaps best seen as the sign of resilience that supports through tough and very tough experiences. Some are mutable with a lifestyle of ongoing and deep inner work that has alchemical potential.

If you are interested you can see my extensive Field Notes at

https://dravrahamcohen.com/field-notes/

Warm wishes,

Avraham

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Krista Stryker's avatar

Resilience is such an important skill to build. Great field notes (I checked out your website) and thanks for the comment, Avraham.

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